I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
