I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
