So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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