If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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