Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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