Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize