i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.