Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
