Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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