Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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