I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i just had sex bonerless
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
