I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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