You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
