K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
