How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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