She is in my trunk
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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