the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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