I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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