I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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