Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize