office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
