She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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