I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
No subtext here. People are naked.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Randomize
