I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize