When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
