You work out of a Hotel?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
