there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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