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• (586): View more from Michigan

  You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.

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• (323): View more from California

  rhymes with "ouble enetration"

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He's only a little bit crosseyed.

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.

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• (631): View more from New York

  He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (281): View more from Texas

  I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..

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• (562): View more from California

  Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic

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• (941): View more from Florida

  do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.

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