kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Did I show you my penis last night?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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