Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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