the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
