make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
