i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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