What a fucking waste of an outfit
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
