8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
