Bisexual people are plain selfish.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
