I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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