Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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