i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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