So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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