Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
