At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Randomize