Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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