He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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