Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize