He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
