you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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