omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I just found a bag of teeth...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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