She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
