Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
