I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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