how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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